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Interview #629: Amazon.com Author One-on-One: Patrick Rothfuss and Brandon Sanderson, Entry #11

Brandon Sanderson

Some writers say that our books are like our children. But now both of us actually do have children. It’s pretty weird, isn’t it? Being a daddy.

Patrick Rothfuss

Oh man, is it ever. How old are yours?

Brandon Sanderson

Three years old and one year old.

Patrick Rothfuss

Got any cute kid stories?

Brandon Sanderson

I’ve got tons of cute kid stories. One happened today at lunch—I’m sure he’ll be embarrassed in ten years if I share this, so that’s a good reason to share it.

We were sitting at lunch and just talking about whether policemen are nice or mean. Because he’s suddenly got it in his head that policemen pull you over—they’ll get you if you do certain things—and we’re trying to explain to him, no, policemen are nice but their job is to keep us safe and to keep us from doing things that they don’t want us to do.

Meanwhile, while we’re getting into this conversation, he does his favorite three-year-old thing which is to start digging for gold in his nose, to use a euphemism. He’s picking his nose quite voraciously, and he freezes and pauses. I just said policemen stop us from doing things we’re not supposed to do, and his mom is very constantly telling him don’t pick your nose.

So he says, “Policeman will get me if I pick my boogers?” And we say, “Um, well, no that’s not technically against the law, but you shouldn’t do it.” And he says, “Policeman wants my boogers? He’ll take them?” Because we’ve been talking about how they’ll take your car away, so he’s suddenly afraid that since he’s not supposed to pick his nose that the policemen will arrest him if he picks his nose and take his boogers away.

So there you go. There’s a wonderful cute kid story for you, or at least a disgusting one, somewhere in there.

Patrick Rothfuss

Wow. I can’t top that. Oot is still just on the cusp of talking.

Just tonight Oot brought me my winter boots and made it clear he wanted to wear them. So I helped him put them on. He just stood there. They were way too big for him to move his feet. But he stood there looking really proud, like he was king of the world.

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